Category Archives: friendship

Mental Toughness

Strong Body. Strong Mind.

These words are ringing true for me today, except in reverse order:

Strong Mind. Strong Body.

We all have days when getting to the gym seems like a battle we’d rather not fight.

So much “TO DO”, so little time.


We also have days when we are motivated to sweat, get strong, and feel powerful. This is how I was feeling today. I wouldn’t say I was extremely energized, but I had the desire to –


OK, so lucky me, getting there was the easy part today – half the mission accomplished.

STAYING “there” was a different story.

I’m not talking about staying physically in the room. I’m talking about staying strong in my mind & fighting through it.

FIGHTING through the things I struggled to do without being disappointed in myself. (um….core work?!)

FIGHTING through the awkward glimpses in the mirror and not loving the reflection. (lighting perhaps??)

FIGHTING the sad-angry-disappointed-jealous thoughts about the way too thin girl in the front row. (so many people LOVE you for YOU!)

FIGHTING the thoughts about the million and one other things that need to be done. (let IT go!)

I could feel myself starting to take a dive after class.

I know, shocking.

But really, with all these things running through my mind in the course of an hour, how could you not start to spiral?


That’s how.

TODAY I know that there will always be outside factors that will try to bring us down, make us feel less than, throw us off our game.

It happens to EVERY BODY. Truly, it does.

Sometimes, you have to take a moment, dig deep, and feel the strength and quiet within.

To me, the real WARRIORS are the ones that can SHUT DOWN the outside chatter and find the quiet determination to persevere and keep moving forward.

THE mantra for today my friends:

SHUT IT DOWN! (say it with a little attitude) 😉

Shut it down with friends that want to drag you into their own private battles.

Shut it down with the person that refuses to see the sunshine through the rain.

Shut it down with YOURSELF when you start to focus on what you ARE NOT instead of what YOU ARE.

Those things don’t serve YOU.

There are so many people that have broken through mental barriers to develop a rock solid mind that has led them to breaking physical barriers they never imagined.

THAT is real strength my friends.

I don’t care how many reps you can do or whether you are rockin’ a six pack. If you are not strong in your own mind, you will not only be unable to serve yourself in the best way possible, but you can’t REALLY BE THERE for those you care about most: your best friend, your husband, your children, your co-workers, your parents, etc.

The strongest warrior is the daughter whose parent is battling cancer, but they push through day after day and STILL bring joy to those around them. Not only does she SHOW UP, she ROCKS!

What about the single mother of two that works two jobs and STILL finds a way to take an hour at the gym because she knows she is a better mother/friend/sister for not neglecting herself.

What about the guy down the block that has a hundred pounds to lose. Every movement he makes feels like a thousand pounds on his weak joints and muscles. But he is there, day after day; fighting the pain; getting STRONGER in mind and body.

This is the true strength that inspires us all. They are rockin – So. Can. YOU!

The really cool thing about MENTAL TOUGHNESS is that we are in 110% control of it. No one can take it away, nothing can destroy it. EVERYONE has the power to OWN IT.

Have a great weekend. Here’s to shutting it DOWN! and being tough (in body and mind) this weekend. I’m “Climbing for the Cure” tomorrow…think I’ll be needing a little mental toughness half-way through the climb. Don’t you worry, I’ll be sure to share the adventure with you all!



Handling Disappointments

I don’t know about you, but I’ve been feeling a little disappointed, not to mention overwhelmed, lately.

There have been many changes at TEAM ADAMS including new jobs, new pressures, and new responsibilities.

It seems like there is never enough time in the day.

I’ve been wishing my energy level was higher (I crash by 9pm almost every night it seems) and I’m disappointed in my wanna be Susie Homemaker skills. I can never get everything done that needs to be accomplished on the home front. PLUS, I am attempting to build my own career in a very tough and competitive industry.

I question the decisions we make for Ella.

What does she need to become an awesome & productive member of society that feels HAPPY and lives in peace with herself?

Add to that the expectation of trying to find time for the husband and me…and also time for me!. Sometimes it happens and sometimes it doesn’t. Sometimes I roll on, and sometimes,


Add to those “internal” expectations and disappointments, all of the “external” voices chirping in your ear.

people you trust and love that surprise you with their hurtful words or actions, places you go (maybe even a fitness class) that are not what you were expecting, the constant media chatter, the news that never ceases to amaze us, good people being dealt a tough deck of cards

It makes you ask:


Put all of that together, and no wonder we feel like we are hamsters on a big-ass wheel!

Here’s the thing – it’s life, it happens. How you deal and cope is what sets you apart from others when it comes to attitude and outlook.

The sermon during mass on Easter Sunday really spoke to me when it comes to this topic. It doesn’t matter what or who you believe in, so hang with me on this.

If you take the time to call to mind YOUR ACTIONS and YOUR THOUGHTS and own up to your end of the bargain, you most likely will cope better than those that never look in the mirror.

The disappointments and heartaches will always be there. After all, the sun wouldn’t be as sweet without the occasional cloudy sky. We have more power than we may think. Sometimes you have to dig pretty FREAKIN’ DEEP!

But it’s there.

Easy to say, tough to do.

I was recently disappointed by a friendship that I had invested so much in. Looking back, it was probably too much. I never took the time to evaluate and reflect…I just went with it, like the hamster on the wheel.

I lost a little bit of myself, sacrificed a part of my core value system and became consumed with a world that was not my own.

Suffice it to say, the friendship ended badly. I was left feeling overwhelmed with disappointment and frustrated that I had no say. After all, it was someone else’s world, not mine, that I ventured to.

I was left to clean up the pieces at a very inconvenient time in my life; isn’t that how it always goes?

Luckily for me (and those around me:) I chose to look in the mirror.

By looking in the mirror, I found so many lessons that are able to help with big and small disappointments.

I need to set boundaries and define expectations in my relationships with others. I tend to be an all or nothing girl – lots of black and white, very little gray.

Guess what, the gray is often where the magic happens.

Embrace the middle ground! Find balance!

Had I set boundaries and placed a bit more space in my friendship that is no more, things would inevitably be different. I looked in the mirror, so I see that now.

If you are disappointed, are you dwelling on what went wrong and agonizing about how you can “fix” it?


Can you let go,

embrace the change,


move on,

and do better next time!

I’m choosing to move on & take the lesson. I enjoy feeling empowered; I’ll leave the disappointment behind for another lesson I’m sure I will be getting one day.

I’m also choosing to think about what is realistic. I have always tried to do so much, maybe too much. It seems a little crazy that it has taken me 34 years to realize “overcommitting” might not be the path of bliss….ah, reality strikes again.

Onward and upward my friends.

Until next time, be you, do what you do.


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